Nine Circles of Hell!: Tuesday, April 24, 2012 Nine Circles of Hell!


It’s 4:20 PM (US central time) – time for the Nine Circles of Hell! It’s all the news that gives you fits in print, today’s nine most hellish news stories.

Click on any of the Nine Circles! in bold to go directly to the original article.

Everybody’s freaking out about the, “‘Cyber Intelligence Sharing and Protection Act because of the considerable power it would give government to examine Americans’ online activities,’ according to the Los Angeles Times. While the government wants to enhance their ability to watch what you do, the CIA is pissed off that they’ve been hacked. Anonymous tweeted the success of CIA TANGO DOWN but later said another hacktivist group executed the denial-of-service attack on the CIA website. The first arrest has been made in the Gulf of Mexico Deepwater Horizon blowout case. An engineer was busted for deleting texts documenting the amount of oil spilled. There’s been a huge increase in the number of students arrested in America’s schools. Shannon Kennedy, a civil rights attorney who has filed a class action suit against Albuquerque’s public school district and its police department on behalf of hundreds of students said, “Kids are being arrested for being kids.” Yet union leaders say Albuquerque teachers face ‘increasingly extreme student behavior, from sexual harassment in elementary schools to children throwing furniture.’ Not that the students’ future is all that bright. US home prices fell for the sixth straight month with Chicago and Cleveland hardest hit. It’s hard to say where things are worst. The US Census figures America’s poorest town is Owsley, Kentucky, where 41.5% of residents live below the poverty line. Since the coal mine closed down, nothing has trickled down on Owsley. The massive profits we’re seeing at places like Apple were supposed to trickle down on all of us. Studies now show that if Apple made their products in the US, not China, they’d still make a ton of money. But that’s not what Apple does. Instead, as the Asian Development Bank reported, “It is the profit maximisation behaviour of Apple rather than competition that pushes Apple to have all iPhones assembled in the PRC.” At least somebody night be figuring out that nothing’s working as promised. Too bad it’s not the US figuring it out first. Jordi Vaquer i Fanés, a political scientist and director of the Barcelona Center for International Affairs in Spain says of Europe’s austerity measures, “The formula is not working, and everyone is now talking about whether austerity is the only solution. Does this mean that German Chancellor Angela Merkel (who led the policy) has lost completely? No. But it does mean that the very nature of the debate about the euro-zone crisis is changing.” We always post the Nine Circles of Hell! blog at 4:20 PM (Chicago time) because the only way to get through today’s real news is by either being stoned beforehand or knowing that you have a huge nug waiting for you when it’s over. Sadly, in most US states that bud is thoroughly illegal and it is, as always, a federal crime. That kinda idiotic drug policy leads kids to desperately discover real horrible ways to numb yourself from the pain of the world. Kids in southern California are ending up in the hospital after drinking hand sanitizer alcohol which is somehow separated out by using salt.

That’s the Nine Circles of Hell! for Tuesday, April 24, 2012.

Come back tomorrow at 4:20 PM (Chicago time) for tomorrow’s Nine Circles of Hell!